The questions and answers found in this booklet were originally a part of Golden Keys 7. However, the more we added questions under these topics, the more we realized these questions are different from the rest of the Teachings. In the rest of the Teachings, the concentration was to help humanity to create an environment that will lead them to reach Pure Consciousness. However, these questions are more toward the mundane part of life. They are from those who want answers to questions that most cultures and religions have been silent about! It seems everyone has been trying to avoid answering them!
Although it seems most people have kept these questions hidden, they are important for humans who want to live a regular life, marry, have children, create a safe society, and have a life based on basic human needs, desires, etc. Many cultures and people have been following ways, on these topics, that have been created by man. So it seems answering these questions is important and might help many who do not really know the best answers to these questions based on nature and Gods Will. Besides, it has been impressed upon me that I must answer all questions submitted to me. The mystery of God is finished, and all questions are answered!
Another reason these questions have been avoided by the Prophets up until this point might be the complexity of the topic. The array of choices for individuals, in some of the situations asked about, is so vast that covering all possibilities and ways people can follow is almost impossible. However, a general guidance will help. The final decision should be made by each individual according to time, place, and people involved (situation). As usual, in any situation the decision can be from ignorance, passion, or Knowledge (Godly).
So keep this in mind and read these answers by realizing how difficult it is to answer any of these questions in such a way that it will be satisfactory in all situations; an impossible task. So do not become frustrated, or judgmental, that the answers are not precise for all possible situations. However, these can be as Guiding Lights to draw better conclusions as to what is best in each situation. Of course, as usual, seeking Gods Will in every decision we have to make is Paramount!
1a- What is the true origin of marriage? Should marriage be exclusively between one man and one woman? Is polygamy acceptable (please explain as different cultures have had different views throughout history)?
We have to follow God's Will in all situations. In general, sex is a part of marriage. Sex in its most basic explanation is a delivery system to create children. The sexual orientation of people should not become a political issue. The bedroom (private lives of people) should be that, private. In general, however, humanity should encourage what is Godly and is based on the Dharma (Innate Nature) of things.
God clearly stated in the Bible that a man and a woman will create the base of the family (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5-6, Mark 10:8). However, we can see in the Bible that most Prophets married more than one wife. How could they be Prophets of God if they seemingly broke this law! What they did must have been allowed by God and their actions accepted by Him (God) that they still stayed His Prophets! God is not a rigid God. According to circumstances (time, place and people) He is willing to bend the rules if it will serve His Purpose and Will.
At the time of Abram (Abraham), for example, the number of Hebrews was small. The greater the number of wives each man could have, the greater the number of Hebrews there would have been. So polygamy was permitted. God also set the way it could have been performed. It was Sarai (Sarah) who brought Hagar to Abram (Abraham) and permitted him to take Hagar as his concubine (second wife)! Therefore, the permission of the first wife is needed for this to happen.
Alternatively, the couple could draw up a prenuptial agreement and decide about this matter before marriage. They might agree that there will not be any other wives, or they might agree that there might be.
Of course, as we said, all Laws of God depend on circumstances. So situations might arise where any and/or all of these rules could be relaxed. The most important Rule is: What is the Will of God in any situation!
We can consider polygamy to be acceptable in situations such as: If the wife is frigid; if the wife uses sex as leverage to dominate the man (usually such a woman becomes more reasonable if there is even the possibility of another woman's presence. This might help the man concentrate on higher things than sexual problems!); if the wife suggests that she would like the helping hand of another woman and their companionship; if there is economic hardship for women who might not be able to provide for themselves and would not mind being in a polygamous relationship; etc.
Other situations that might necessitate the decision to have polygamy in a society are: If a great disaster destroys most humans on earth so we need to repopulate the earth; if humans start traveling into space and new colonies need to propagate a greater number of humans; if Mission members felt they could increase the number of people in the Mission by practicing polygamy; and any other situation that seems to be a practical decision and/or is the Will of God!
At this state of human existence, when overpopulation is creating problems, probably it is not a good idea to encourage polygamy. However, even recently it has been in the news that many women in Russia are petitioning their government to legalize polygamy because they cannot survive by themselves alone!
Furthermore, humans do misuse the Words of the Prophets and God. This explanation should not become a license for abuse and misuse. That is why society has to be aware of what is needed, be flexible according to that situation, and impose God's Will and Laws in any situation (for example, when David ate the shewbread which he was forbidden to eat, Matthew 12:4, Mark 2:26, Luke 6:4).
Again the importance of the concept of Leaders who are connected to Spirit (Paravipras) becomes clearer. They can see what the Will of God is and implement His Will instead of intellectual understandings and their rigid concepts!
The circumstances of the couple should also be considered. Indeed it is mostly up to them! If the first wife sees the presence of another woman as necessary and all parties agree with the decision, it is not anyone's business to interfere with their situation (unless the decision is not based on free will and is imposed on any member in the party).
Again, as the Bible clearly says, one man and one woman should be the norm (in normal circumstances). However, there are situations where this can (should) be relaxed and polygamy is acceptable (not more than four permanent wives). It should be rare. In any case it should be up to the people involved. In general, the husband should support the wives and be equally fair to all of them!
It was asked: Is not sex without being married similar to polygamy? The answer is: Sex without being married, God called adultery and fornication. That, He said you should not do. Polygamy, He never said you should not do. They are not the same. However, He also made it clear that polygamy should not be done in haste!
Some people say that in a woman's later years, after menopause, she is not as interested in sex while the man still is. So the man should be allowed to have more wives and more children. One alternative is for the man to go more towards God in the old age and overcome sensual longings, so as to be prepared to leave the body and go to God. Even in this case, however, it is up to the people involved.
Before this writing, the Revelation was that there cannot be polygamists in a Community of Light. However, after further consideration, it was Revealed that it would be best to leave this decision to each Community. There could be Communities that will decide to be solely monogamous. There could be Communities that might not.
The main reason for originally not allowing polygamy in the COLs, as stated above, was: In electing leaders or other vote-based community decisions, a man with many wives would automatically have more people voting as he does (assuming his wives vote as he wants them to), the result being that his vote would basically count more than those with one wife, or even those with fewer wives than him. Also, having multiple wives leads to too many people voting in a COL (no longer just twelve people in the Twelve-People Leader Selection Process - see Mount Zion and Zion in THOTH), which goes against the very reason COLs are created.
To avoid this problem, when a vote comes up, all the wives of a polygamist could, in advance, vote among themselves to find the majority vote in their group and then collectively vote that way as one body (one vote)! (If this arrangement is not acceptable for a woman or a community, they should decide not to have polygamous relationships!)
Polygamy should not become a political issue, and no human law should ever be passed to oppose or endorse it!
In any case, having a dedicated, chaste, Godly woman as a wife is priceless. If the husband of such a woman hurts her by marrying another woman, he has committed a Great Sin! Sarah herself decided that Abram (Abraham) should have another wife. Mohammed never married another woman while Khadijah was alive. So both Abram (Abraham) and Mohammed respected their first wives greatly!
In general: Monogamy is based on emotion but polygamy is logical!
There really should not be any argument that this is the Will of God. If something was created in nature, there is a very good (God) reason for it!
The very word "virgin" has always been taken to mean Purity, Freshness, Desirable. These qualities are very important to the human. Even in the case of merchandise, if one can afford it, most people will buy new and unused things for themselves. Secondhand products are not desirable and are cheaper. They are cheaper because you are not the first person who owned them; shoes that are used by many people no longer will fit any foot, a sweater used by a large man might no longer be useable by a man with a smaller body, etc.
Also, the first sexual encounter for women is the most important. Women who have had sexual relationships with many men, most probably, can no longer be satisfied to be with only one man. This also will bring great confusion to them and the society. This trend will spread all through a society until not being a virgin before marriage becomes the norm. Since there will be a great feeling of Guilt (because they have gone against God's/Nature's way), they will put God out of the picture more and more. That society is doomed!
Godly women have the cradle of the society in their hands. When women are confused, the whole society falls apart. For most men, women are the door to Heaven and/or Hell! So do not underestimate women. In fact, women are very powerful. A Godly woman is the most powerful. When a Godly woman marries the first man they consider their sweetheart, they will be most dedicated to him. However, this dedication is transferred to their children after they are born. This can be another reason, besides many others, that God has permitted men to have more than one wife. Most Godly women would rather be left alone to raise their children!
Being a virgin for men, it seems, in the Eyes of Nature, is not as important as it is for women. Apparently there are two different rules for men and women. It is because there are many differences between men and women: There is no apparent natural way to identify if a man is a virgin or not (like virginity in women); men have sexual desire, almost, all through their lives and can have children far into old age; women can have only one child every nine months, while men can impregnate many women in the same time period (have more than one child with many women); etc., etc.
So it seems women are expected to stay virgin, stay with one man all their life, and tolerate if a man chooses to have more than one wife (the permission of the first wife is necessary), etc. The man is the one who is supposed to be the provider and protector of the woman and the family. If he cannot do this, he has no right to have any wife. However, if a couple decides that the woman is the bread winner, or both want to work to provide a better life for themselves and their children, that is ok too, so long as the children will not suffer. However, this should be the exception rather than the norm!
This is the way of God and nature. No matter how much we argue, if we go against nature, we (humans) will eventually suffer for our transgression.
Of course there are always exceptions. However, when the exception becomes the norm, that is when the problem starts. The couples should seek God's Way in every situation and follow what is the most High!
If a man is willing to marry a woman who is not a virgin, so be it, that is fine. If such women did not find men to marry, still they can perform a great role in society. The best choice would be to dedicate their lives to God and become renunciates (sannyasins). Or they might become temporary wives for those who cannot afford to have a permanent wife (wives). Or be a way for a couple to have children (surrogate mother). This might also give the opportunity for young men to marry them temporarily to learn the art of love-making, or Tantra, before their permanent marriage, etc.!
Another reason for restricting sexual relationships is to control venereal diseases, some of which are devastating. Even in our system, everyone has to be very aware of such diseases and avoid any situation that such diseases might be transmitted to them. If a disease was transmitted to a person, s/he should be honest about it and not transmit it to anyone else. You are your brothers' and sisters' keeper.
Self-discipline in sexual relationships also prevents unwanted pregnancies, undesirable emotional entanglements, social implications, etc. Whatever God has Commanded, has Great benefits for man!
For most humans the very seed of pleasure of the sexual relationship is at the first chakra. In fact sex is the only time they experience the pleasure of the raised Kundalini. It is the Kundalini that is stimulated in the sexual relationship, and eventually at the time of fulfillment (climax), it raises for a very short period of time. Depending on where your spirit is (which chakra you are at) the pleasure will be experienced differently.
Many great souls have realized this and that is where the base of the relationship between sexual experiences and spiritual progress is found. These masters have recommended that the aspirant overcome the desire for sex by left-handed Tantric sexual practices. In this practice the couple meditates together while engaging in the sexual act. They try to overcome sexual desire by understanding its nature (meditating on the process, etc.). By overcoming the desire to reach the climax of the sexual relationship, they overcome sex itself!
So the idea is to bring the Kundalini to the higher level and so experience the Joy of higher self rather than become addicted to the temporary pleasure of sex. As the Kundalini is raised to higher levels in both partners (married couple), the relationship between the couple expands itself not only to the sexual relationship but to the whole life. They dance together in the endless oneness in God. Then sex becomes a pleasure of being together and enjoying one another. The act of sex becomes a very small part of their relationship.
Since the Kundalini resides in the first chakra, stimulation of this chakra brings some pleasure in a sexual relationship. Those who are persuaded to have the pleasure of sex in this way accept that this is the best way to have a sexual relationship.
In some instances the energy (Kundalini) is blocked. These are the only true homosexuals! Only around 1.7% of the human race are true homosexuals.
For gay (male) relationships, the energy is blocked in the first chakra, so the desire to have anal sex to raise the Kundalini in this way attracts the person to homosexual activities. They demonstrate feminine traits. Basically they say to nature, "I am a woman, not a man!"
Since the Kundalini resides in the first chakra for everyone, even if a person is not homosexual, if they engage in homosexual activities, the Kundalini will become blocked in the first chakra and they will experience great pleasure in homosexual relationships. Such people are created by social dysfunction and are false homosexuals.
This is also true about females. In this case, it is the women who display masculine traits (often called 'butch' which we will use for lack of a better word) due to an energy blockage or genetic defect who are the true lesbians. How this blockage happens can have many explanations. They will approach vulnerable women who will become attracted to their male energy. Such women, as the female part in the relationship, are sometimes called 'femme.' Therefore true lesbians are the butch; their partners are being seduced into such relationships! Lesbians might not agree with this statement and say that the relationship is natural and desired by both sides, but that is not the truth.
In some lesbian relationships, there is no butch or femme. These are not true lesbians; they are created by the social effect (as it is explained below).
So there are true homosexuals and false homosexuals. False homosexuals are made through social malfunctions. They are found all through history. Usually in societies which become prosperous, people become self-centered. Couples no longer struggle together, and sacrificing is not required for a better life. They create unrealistic expectations from one another. This results in unhappiness and many divorces, etc. Men and women seek shelter and comfort with the same(homo) sex. They end up having sex and so the number of homosexuals increases beyond the true 1.7%. After a while this practice becomes so prevalent that everyone accepts it as a natural phenomenon! It is not. If it was natural God would not have called it an "Abomination!"
In the Kingdom this problem will be realized and couples (a man and a woman) will sacrifice to bring everyone to higher consciousness and eventually Pure Consciousness. They will not become unhappy for artificial reasons and will not seek comfort only from one other person (each other). They will be comforted by the whole community, and so the sexual energy will stay healthy and natural between the couple.
Therefore, if homosexuals realize these Truths (above), the majority of the ones who consider themselves as born homosexuals will realize that they are the victims of a malfunctioning society!
The very minority of homosexuals who have a problem with the energy being blocked in the lower chakras can overcome this problem. Meditation, prayer, a balanced diet with less meat eaten (especially these days when most meat contains hormones that promote this lifestyle!), cooling of the body (half-bath and other cooling techniques), Tandava or Tandavi exercises, etc., and of course, His Grace, will transfer the energy trapped in the lower chakras to higher ones. These all will help them to become normal. In an environment where people are encouraged to meditate and Know the self, fewer will be found who have blocked energy and so the number of those who have this problem will decrease.
Of course the other kind of homosexuals also can benefit from these recommendations.
It clearly has been revealed to us that the kingdom of God is based on Pure Heterosexual couples. We hope that homosexuals will listen to these Truths, overcome this lifestyle, and then, if possible, join the Communities Of Light which is the base of the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth (if not in this lifetime, then perhaps in the next one). If they will not and continue this lifestyle as individuals, it is a personal Karma, and we neither condemn them nor support them: We leave them to God. However, if society accepts such behavior, it becomes a collective Karma, and those who accept it will pay for it collectively.
There is no doubt that it is an anomaly. It should never become a political issue!
We do not hate homosexuals, as our teaching is that God is everything, including homosexuals. However, we do not approve actions, by anyone, which are not Godly (Natural)!
It seems the problem of many people becoming pedophiles has reached an epidemic proportion. You can contribute this, and many others ills in our society, to going against God's setup. The setup is to have communities where the children are watched and responsible adults are always present. You can explain this phenomenon in one sentence: Availability of vulnerable children and uncontrollable/unfulfilled sexual desires of men.
If a child is properly supervised with adults whom society and parents (mostly parents, grandparents, and very close and trusted people to the family) such men will not have the chance to harm the child. No matter how many laws we pass, no matter how much we spend on police and security, the children will not be as safe and secure as with the supervision of a trusted adult, mainly the mother and/or another close female!
The setup of God and His Way has already been Revealed to man. It is the family with clear division of labor. Man is the provider, and woman is the nurturer and supervisor of the children (besides other duties for both). This creation is created for a special purpose. All the Laws and setups are for that end (purpose). Break the Ways of God and you break yourself against them.
Another point that should be understood can be called: Sexual fixation! That is: The first sexual experience, for man and woman, fixes that person to those kinds of sexual desires/behavior!
A teenager, with his hormones raging, with access to a child who is not supervised and/or is vulnerable, might act on impulse and have his first sexual experience this way. He most probably will become a pedophile. A first time painful sexual experience might lead to avoiding it for one's life (lives)! A man who has his first experience with a prostitute might create a fixation for this kind of relationship for the rest of his life. A person who has been abused as a child might very well become a child abuser himself. People who have sexual relationships with many partners create fixations that will prevent them from staying with one person and being faithful to that person, etc.
So the availability of vulnerable children, teenagers with raging hormones (and immature men) will take advantage of these situations, and we will have many pedophiles.
Another possibility for how a pedophile is created is that the misused child becomes a misuser himself. Again with a little supervision children will not be misused and so they will not become a misuser themselves!
Therefore creation of families based on God's Way, even better, families in the Communities Of Light, cannot be over-emphasized. Furthermore, since the first sexual experience is so important, God has set the way for men and women to marry early, mostly probably after puberty! If they have their first experience with their wife or husband, and they stay together in God (with the help of family and community), such a union is indeed Blessed by God.
So the solution to stop the epidemic phenomenon of many pedophiles in the society, like all human ills, is God and His Ways. Any other ways will not work!
If we do not accept this, eventually some might ask: If homosexuals should be accepted and have all the rights of heterosexuals, why should pedophiles not also have the same rights, as they believe they have also been born that way? If we accept homosexuals, why not pedophiles?
1f- What about those who are asexual?
Those who are born "Asexual" (have no sexual desire as the regular human does) and have little need for companionship (or can overcome this need) are best suited to be renunciates (sannyasins). If such people dedicate their lives to God 100%, they can become great Souls!
These are the people Christ referred to when He said: "For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb..." (Matthew 19:12).
2- Where does Maitreya stand on abortion?
Abortion is a decision by the couple (although they might consult with those whom they trust and/or the Elders). Sex should be performed within the bonds of marriage. Both people in this act agreed and consented to the act and so both have an equal say in the matter. Since at the time of marriage they became as one flesh, it is a decision that should be made as one flesh. If they did not want to become pregnant, that decision should also have been made as one flesh! Of course if the life of the mother is in danger, the abortion is no longer a decision to be made. It is made for them.
If there is a dispute in this decision between them (to abort a child or not) and no reconciliation can be reached to accommodate the situation, then they are not one flesh. They most probably should divorce (they are not one flesh).
If it is the mother who does not want the child, then she should have the child and the father should raise the child, as he wants the child. He should be able to support the child financially, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. The father cannot have the child if other issues are present (he is a pedophile, drug addict, not Godly, etc.).
If it is the father who does not want the child, then the mother should have the child and she should raise the child. She should be able to support the child financially, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually. The mother cannot have the child if other issues are present (she has mental problems, is a drug addict, not Godly, etc.).
No matter how wonderful a single parent might be, the presence of both the father and the mother is extremely important to the development of the child. So the decision to have a child should be discussed and agreed upon before the child is conceived! However, if the child has already been conceived, most probably both should agree to accept the child and raise him.
If pregnancy has happened outside of the bonds of marriage, then it is a fornication (or adultery) and is against God's Commandments. The couple should keep the child. Raising the child will be the payment for their sin. The couple should marry so that the child becomes legitimate. In the case of adultery, the decision is up to all involved parties. However, the child has to become as legitimate as possible and be supported. If the adulteress is the wife, the husband has every right to divorce her with no responsibility towards her. If the adulterer is the husband, the wife has the same rights.
The Laws of God should be accepted, encouraged, and promoted in the society. If the people do not follow His Laws, they will lose His Grace and His Face will be against them!
3a- A few people have asked me about an important subject in life today, and there is no text in THOTH about it: Sexuality, how often, the use of it, control of it, etc.?
Before anything, know that sexual energy is the very creative force in the universe. The more you master it, the greater your creative mind will be.
It is an incredibly vast topic. We have touched on the most important parts of it in THOTH. The explanation of it has been interwoven in many places in THOTH. Although it might not be too apparent to the eye, a part of family life and society, as explained in THOTH, is based on this energy. It is raja guna in the procreative state in the material world.
Now, you have asked some direct questions about sex. It seems you want a definite answer for them in a black and white manner.
This universe is not created in a black and white manner. There are guidelines to use everything, not from ignorance or passion, but from knowledge. In order to understand these guidelines, we have to first understand the nature of the subject before we can recognize why these guidelines are necessary.
As I explained above, sexual energy is raja guna in the procreative state in the material world. The most important words in this sentence are, "material world." If you look at the sexual place in the body, it is placed over the second chakra. The first three chakras are the lower nature of man.
The first chakra is where tama guna dominates. It is related to solid factor. It is where solid waste is disposed of. The second chakra is dominated by raja guna or energy. It is related to liquid factor (liquid waste). The third chakra is dominated by satva guna. It is related to heat and fire (the digestion of food needs heat). These three forces in these states are all directed to the external world. They are the human's lower nature. The stimulation of these lower energies, especially if used in a way that is not based on God's Laws, will create confusion and suffering.
With all of this said, however, there is nothing bad in this universe. How it is used makes it good or evil! Anything in this universe can be used from ignorance, passion, or knowledge. This is true even for the lower nature and/or sexual energies!
You do not kill a wild horse. You tame it. Then you have a powerful friend to assist you in many ways.
The use of sexual energy, therefore, like anything else, can be from ignorance, passion, or knowledge. The use of it from ignorance and/or passion will bring suffering and confusion.
Sexual energy used from knowledge can be channeled in two ways. First, it can be used in a family environment to create stronger bonds between the couple and to create children. Families are the blocks that a society is built on. The stronger the families are, the stronger the society will be.
If a person is not attracted to family life, then the sexual energy can be channeled to higher chakras and used as higher creative forces. Such people can greatly serve the universal family. These are the ones who become renunciates (sannyasins).
Therefore, control of the sexual energy and mastering it is recommended for everyone, married or not. Now how to control it? It can be controlled with a more vegetarian diet, meditation, taking cool baths or using the half-bath procedure, using the recommended dances Tandava for men and Tandavi for women, prayer (asking for God's Grace to transform this energy to the higher ones, to the Grace), and being one-pointed to do His Will.
One of the techniques used to control sexual energies in men is the use of the lungota (langota, langot, lungoti, etc.). It is a scientific fact that heat decreases the production of sperm in men. That is why when the weather is hot, the testicles lower to bring the testes away from the heat of the body, so they can maintain their required temperature. This is reversed when the weather is cold. The lungota keeps the testes always close to the body heat. This decreases the production of sperm. It also prevents unwanted erection of the sexual organ. These both lower the undesirable sexual energies and bring greater control of them to the person.
The lungota does not destroy sexual energy, but channels the excess energy to higher chakras. It is a simple loincloth that keeps the sexual organ of men close to their bodies. It is recommended for both married and unmarried people.
The act of lovemaking and sexual intercourse is much deeper than a physical closeness. In any relationship and closeness, an etheric bond is involved. In the sexual relationship, this etheric bond is the strongest. It is the closest ethereal merging in the physical world. This is the reason a couple becomes close and attached to one another. This closeness has to be cherished, nurtured, and used for greater bonds in the family environment. That is what God had intended!
Therefore, we can see how sexual energies and the relationships between men and women have a much deeper effect and reason than having an erection and being released from it. Of course, I am sure, many do not agree with me. Even if they agree in their minds and hearts, when they are put in a stimulating situation all this reasoning will be thrown out the window. However, those who want to be strong and above it all will understand these truths and will not be deterred even in the most stimulating situations.
This does not mean that by reading these writings or even following the recommended procedures, the sexual problems of the world will go away overnight. However, those who understand and try to master these energies will have their eye on a time when they will be in control. These are the ones who will succeed.
Sexual energies are powerful, as are other tendencies in different chakras. However, the more of these tendencies are transformed to higher levels, the freer you will be unto God. God is in All levels!
3b- There is nothing written specifically on sexuality in THOTH or elsewhere in the Mission, or am I wrong?
Probably the reason is that there is not a specific answer to this (or many) question(s). As I said, what I explained above (and throughout THOTH) are guidelines. It is you who has to draw conclusions from them, according to your situation!
It does not matter how much I explain. Unless you understand and are willing to comply, you will not benefit much. The reason is that if you do not believe that what I say is true and best for you, then you will do what you want to do. Even if you do believe, you have to have the resolve to follow through. Adam and Eve were told what was good for them. Did they listen?
3c- Anyway, I would like to have a written opinion of Maitreya on this delicate subject. I know there are a few references to it in other subjects (indirectly), but precisely please.
You have answered your question yourself. It is, like a lot of others, a topic that cannot be looked upon precisely. Just look at its effect and variety in human existence. Precise answers might not work in all situations, and might indeed create suffering for many.
Precise answers also can later on become dogmas. Then whoever will not or cannot follow such dogmas will suffer. Is not the reason for dogmas that the Prophet or the Forerunner gives a precise recommendation for a specific situation, and then later on this becomes a dogma?
This is true even about human laws. They were created for specific situations and were for that time. That is why many of them are not working today. The law has become more important than justice. The dogma has become more important than the truth!
I can give you precise answers. Probably many will feel much better about it. There will be laws and regulations to follow. They will not have to think and realize anything. But I will also create a lot of suffering for those people and for others in the future.
Probably this is one reason that the Mission might not appeal to some people. We are asking man to understand the guidelines given in THOTH and come to the right conclusions. However, they want only the conclusions. They ask me to give the ultimate answer, to be precise. The problem is there is no precise answer. That is why we preach the Communities of Light and give the guideline, Eternal Divine Path, to create them.
Furthermore, precise answers will become rigid and unyielding. This will create suffering and ignorance.
3d- How about: Celibacy vs. sexuality; relations before marriage, during marriage, without marriage, and after marriage (if one of the two dies); frequency; control; sexuality in the future community; minimum and maximum age; female and male homosexuality (causes, state, utility, suggestions, etc.); sacred aspect; education; the difference between sensuality, love, tenderness and sexuality (also procreation); etc.?
Although some of the questions above can be answered precisely, the others will be answered in general form. Let's take them one by one:
a- Celibacy vs. sexuality: If you are inclined toward celibacy and are able to maintain it, then you can accomplish great things. However, if you force yourself to it but your mind is full of sexual desires, probably you will not benefit much from it.
Sexuality or satisfaction of it is best done in a family environment, based on God, between a man and a woman. It can further strengthen the family bonds. This will create a great environment to nurture strong, loving, and balanced beings. These children will be satisfied physically (someone is there to take care of them), mentally (will be taught and educated), emotionally (will be loved), and spiritually (the marriage and family has been based on God).
b- Relations before marriage [all throughout our writings, marriage, permanent or temporary, is between a male and a female]: The ideal is no relationships before marriage. This is the most recommended. That is why God created virginity in women (I know most people do not agree with this statement, but God does).
To make this course possible, in many religions it is recommended for men and women to marry at an early age. Probably women can be mature enough for marriage between the ages of 14 and 16, and men between the ages of 16 and 18.
Because men and women are very young in these ages, the advice of the parents and especially a true spiritual teacher is recommended, as well as the support of the community. The reason is that the youngsters might make mistakes in this regard. Parents, the spiritual teacher, and/or the wise people in the communities are supposed to guide them to choose what is best for their physical, mental, and especially spiritual progress. The community will also be greatly helpful in maintaining balance in their lives. This is even more important in the Communities of Light, where the wise Elders can help couples as well.
However, at present, this beautiful idea is being misused by greedy or ignorant parents and unspiritual teachers. It has become a right for parents and teachers instead of a privilege in many cultures. However, loving and enlightened parents, teachers, and elders (wise people) can save a great deal of trouble for a couple in their marriage.
c- During marriage: In most relationships, the man and woman try to become one with each other. This is a great mistake. However, if each bases his or her life on God and becomes One with Him, then their spirits are One with Him and the same. They become One with Him, so they will be One. There is a great truth in the saying, "A family that prays together stays together."
Therefore, the sexual relationship will become a joy and another way to be unified in spirit with God, who is the true Enjoyer anyway!
In such a sexual relationship based on commitment to the family and God, there is no ego involved. The family is based on God's Laws and Love. God makes Love with God. In both it is God who is the center, not "I". Where there is no ego there is unity, joy, prosperity..., and no suffering!
d- Without marriage: The people who are not married can be categorized into two groups: Those who are celibate and those who are seeking sexual experiences in this stage. The ones who are celibate are preferable to the other ones.
Those who are seeking sexual experiences in this stage have no choice but to enter relationships with little or no commitment. Sex without family commitment will eventually result in suffering physically (sexual disease), mentally (too much thought and mind energy goes to it), emotionally (loss of the partner to others), spiritually (spirit will become confused), and socially (society will become weak).
If two unmarried people decide to stay together temporarily, it is required for them to state the length of time they want to be together. This is known as a temporary marriage arrangement. Even in this case, be it only for one day, a couple should treat their relationship as a marriage (remember, sex without commitment will create suffering and confusion). They should invoke the Name of the Lord in this relationship and base it on Spirit (God). This kind of marriage is not recommended for virgins (however, it is acceptable if they are older than 25).
Those who want to be in a temporary marriage should try to make this kind of marriage permanent. At the time of the termination of a temporary marriage, the woman should refrain from another marriage or engaging in any sexual intercourse for four months and ten days. This will make certain who is the father, if there has been a conception. If this rule is not followed, a genetic test should be done to determine the father of the child.
After a temporary marriage expires, if the couple still wants to stay together, they can decide to marry permanently.
e- After marriage (if one of the two dies): This question is more difficult to answer. Here a family has already been formed. There are more things to consider than just the marriage of a single person. There may be children present. There are memories involved with the dead person. In this situation a person probably has to consider marriage as a more remote possibility than when he was single.
However, if people in this situation can justify the action, create another family based on God, not harm the children in the process, and have a strong desire to do so, they can remarry. The opinion of a true spiritual teacher in this regard is recommended.
f- Frequency: Depends upon time, place, and people involved. The guideline is: Anything from ignorance or passion will create suffering. Also the goal is to transfer the lower energies to higher ones.
g- Control: With a balanced diet, meditation, prayer, God's Grace, etc., the sexual energy can be transformed into Higher energy. Then this desire will be directed towards greater creative purposes. This is the goal.
The use of cool water (half-bath), wearing the lungota, and exercises which transform lower energies to higher ones are recommended. For those who have great difficulty with sexual energies, the exercises Tandava for men and Tandavi for women are very helpful! The Tandavi will also help women in strengthening their pelvic floor muscles after childbirth.
h- Sexuality in the future community: A relationship from knowledge is based on marriage and God. Such pure couples will provide an environment to create children for His Kingdom and will create strong families as building blocks for the society and the Kingdom. These ideal couples will form the base for the Communities of Light.
As people will meditate, want to follow the Eternal Divine Path, and create Communities of Light, their energies and intentions will be directed toward God, not toward this external world. Such people can then truly follow what Esa taught in the "Sermon on the Mount." They will realize the importance of families based on God. This is the ideal we hope to manifest in the Communities of Light.
i- Minimum and maximum age: Minimum age for women is between 14 to 16, depending upon the maturity of their physical, mental, and emotional bodies. For men it is between 16 to 18. There is no maximum age. Men and women can marry any time. Some might marry simply because they can accomplish more together.
j- Female and male homosexuality (causes, state, utility, suggestions, etc.): Homosexuality basically is a chakra (hormonal) problem. It is from energies locked in lower psychic centers. This can occur in two ways. First are the cases of those who are born with this problem. Second are those who reach this state because of the society.
When society loses its moral values and the basic family structure is no longer supported, men and women lose their way. The basic family values are, usually, broken when a society becomes prosperous. The notion of "in God we trust" changes to "in ourselves we trust." Therefore, to follow one's selfish ways becomes more important than what God intended (His Will).
To create a family and follow its values requires some sacrifice. If it is based on God, since the attention is on God, sacrifices are easy and the family will prosper. Also, if the couple is poor and has no choice but to stay together, and accepts the sacrifices necessary, in this case also the family will succeed.
However, if we neither do things according to Spirit (God) nor have any need (economically) to stay in a family environment, then we do not have to sacrifice for it. It is then that like-minded men and women feel more attracted to one another and homosexuality becomes an epidemic.
Usually it is in this stage, when the societies have fallen this far, that they slip toward destruction. We can see examples of this trend in all ancient societies in which the family structure was destroyed. If any society falls into the same situation, their destruction is imminent. It makes no difference how powerful and prosperous they may appear. They will be destroyed from within.
To cure this problem, we have to heal the society. This can be done by formation of the Communities of Light based on the family structure (a couple as a man and a woman). This healing is greater than the healing of the blind, sick, or raising the physically dead. This is our Mission, To Heal the Earth!
In general, meditation, prayer, a balanced diet, cooling of the body (half-bath), Tandava or Tandavi exercises, etc., and of course, His Grace, will transfer the energy trapped in the lower chakras to higher ones. This is the goal of all spiritual endeavors: To transform lower tendencies to higher ones.
Besides, a form of genetic studies known as epigenetics has revealed that there are parts of genes that are responsible for our tendencies and genetic inheritances. It has also been discovered that these parts of genes can be turned on or off. With this knowledge, even those who are born with homosexual desires can be changed by turning off the genes which are responsible for such tendencies!
k- Sacred aspect: As it was said, lovemaking is mostly an ethereal function. When it is viewed in a more fleshly manner, it loses its higher purpose. In the high ethereal level (Spirit), All things are sacred and follow the Universal Laws. In this state, the relationship is based on God, not on flesh. Such a relationship is as strong as or even stronger than anything in the manifested world.
Such couples are bound together forever. The act of physical lovemaking becomes less and less important. They make Love all the time, because they know that the very Creation is an act of Love and lovemaking. They are in a constant Dance of Love. Indeed such a relationship is most sacred.
l- Education: It is important for men and women to be educated to be with true women and men. It is imperative that they learn the Ways of God and act accordingly. They should realize the higher reason(s) for marriage and sexual relationships. They should base their lives on God and His Will (Purpose).
With meditation, good diet, the examples of Elders, etc., men and women will look at each others' Souls and spirits rather than each others' flesh. Then they will not lust after each other but love one another and choose their partners for great commitment.
The sexual relationship indeed can be used for transforming lower energies to higher ones. In this process couples will meditate with one another (Tantra) rather than only achieving the ultimate goal of physical lovemaking (orgasm).
Therefore, couples will gain greater control over their lust and eventually over their desires, and will Love one another for what they are (their spirit and Soul) rather than with earthly love. This is another lesson that married couples should learn.
m- Difference between sensuality, love, tenderness, and sexuality: Love (with a capital "L") is greater than tenderness. Tenderness is greater than love (with a small "l," or earthly love). Sensuality and sexuality are fleshly desires (if they are not within the bounds of a Godly marriage). They are manifestations of trapped and untransformed energies.
Any of these, however, can be from ignorance, passion or knowledge. There is nothing good or evil in this universe. They become good or evil according to their use in a given situation (time, place, and people involved).
n- Also procreation, etc.: As it is explained above, the sexual relationship has a multitude of aspects to it. Procreation is one of them. Children born to spiritually (Godly) based families are the base of the Communities of Light and the Kingdom!
3e- These [questions above] are human questions for when we are incarnated in the physical body, and are important in Occidental and North American values and attitudes today.
For God there is no East, West, South, or North. His Laws are equally applicable all throughout the earth and the universe.
The problems with relationships in general and the sexual relationship in particular are the same all throughout the earth. Probably these problems, like many others, are more openly discussed in the West today. However, these are old problems that have occupied the minds of many all throughout human history and beyond.
There is no easy way out. The only way out of it is, "To Love your God with all your Heart, Mind, and Spirit." Only with His Grace, and with transforming your energy and directing your attention from the physical world to Him and the spiritual world, can you escape the suffering(s) of this external world.
Let no man fool you. Any other way(s) will not work for long. If you are looking for a quick answer or wanting me to tell you what you (or anyone else) wants to hear, you are asking the wrong person. Those whom God chooses to bring a Message (or Truth) to humanity are not here to please men (humans) but to tell the truth.
You say, "These are human questions for when we are incarnated in the physical body." There is nothing out of God. There are no purely human solutions for human problems. There are only Godly solutions. This is what all Prophets and Messengers have brought to humanity. Of course, humans and their lower natures distort the truth to fit their lower energies. It is not God (Spirit) who brings suffering(s) on man but man (flesh) himself.
4- Is it necessary for a man to know what kind of body he is marrying? So shouldn't we show as much flesh as we want so the potential mate knows how beautiful we are, or are there rules about how we clothe ourselves?
In Essays 3 under the title "Clothing," we have this very general statement:
Clothes should be decent and modest in appearance, and according to the situation in such a way that an upright mind would not object.
It is better for men and women to wear distinct clothing.
Here we will try to go into more detail on this topic:
It is paramount that you understand the Will of God for you and follow it. The whole idea is that you follow what is recommended because you understand the reason and significance of these rules and so will not break them. Those who are Godly will have no problem following them, and those who are not, no matter how much they are told and no matter how these rules are explained to them (or enforced) will break God's Laws the first opportunity they have. So it is for you to understand, accept, and follow because the rules are good (God) for you and the environment!
We have to attract our mate with inner beauty, not outer!
We will divide this topic into four sections: Women's Clothing, Men's Clothing, Children's Clothing, and Exceptions to These Rules.
The more covered women will be, in loose clothing (showing as few curves as possible), the better it will be for them and the environment! This rule may be relaxed a little for those who are not married and are looking for a mate. For those who are married, their body should be exposed only to their husbands, and to a lesser degree to their family (these rules can be relaxed a little when they are at home with their family).
The female body is very attractive to men. Although men also should become strong enough to resist this attraction, most men are not that strong, yet! So this attraction brings them to their lower natures and they start thinking with their sexual urges instead of higher thoughts. This is a strong reason, in the societies with many sexual stimulations, that men lose control. Some women might think this is good but it is not. This is another sign of a fallen society which will be destroyed.
So women have a great responsibility to bring the Kingdom of God On Earth by realizing how powerful they are, and that like Eve, they can make men fall. For the good of society, Godly women will resist this urge to exhibit their God-given power.
Also the more covered and inaccessible women are, the more mysterious they will be and great men will seek them to discover their mystery (God-given beauty). They (men) should be able to accomplish this only through marriage. Since men have to marry in order to have a woman, they are ready to marry as soon as possible (makes this process much easier for women). COLs can be very helpful in finding good wives and husbands for their members, and since they have grown together (or at least have similar backgrounds) they already know each other well. The more exposed women are, the more men with lesser qualities they will attract!
The traditional chador worn by some Muslim women is an ingenious way to quickly cover the whole body. It releases women from working hard on their hair, makeup, etc. In Islamic cultures, even many women who do not usually wear the chador, do wear it when they want to leave the house quickly without makeup, a good hairdo, etc. Of course, there are many women who wear them for covering their body all the time.
Another quick way to become very modest is to wear a shawl over the shoulders (or a head covering) which also covers one's breasts. Loose Saris, what some traditional Indian women wear, are also very graceful and spiritual. Or you can come up with new clothing which is Graceful, covers the body, and is beautiful and Godly (maybe a fusion of fashion from many cultures and also modest)!
One controversial piece of clothing is pants. Pants are mostly for men. However, if women have to wear them (like women in some communities wear them because it is easier to work in them) they should wear a skirt over the pants. The skirt over the pants can be as short as a few inches above their knee or longer to their feet (floor).
Men also should be modest. The more covered men will be, in loose clothing (showing as few curves as possible), the better it will be for them and the environment! If for any reason they have to wear the minimum clothing (such as hard labor in hot weather outside) they should at least be covered from the waist down to their knees (or below the knees). Even in these cases wearing a shirt is preferable.
So the minimum should be shorts (from the waist to the knees) and a shirt. It is even better if you can avoid wearing shorts and wear long pants or something that covers the body below the knees (like dhotis worn by Indian men in India, or other clothing that covers from the waist to below the knees)!
Children should be taught the rules above and dressed accordingly, so when they are adults, following these rules becomes second nature to them!
Exceptions to These Rules:
As there are always exceptions to relative rules, this also is true in this case. For example, a female swimming athlete might have no choice but to wear a very tight swimsuit. So there might be situations where these rules might be relaxed. However, in general these are the Will of God for men and women to help the society to become Godly. If you have the choice to be covered, take that route. Exposing the body is not the highest to present yourself, be it a woman or a man. The more you are covered, the better it is!
For the reasons above, group activities should be segregated to male and female (especially after puberty) as much as possible!
4a- Do you have any guidelines for sex in marriage?
Marriage is a contract between a couple (a man and a woman) to do great things. That is: To create a Godly family (the base of the COLs and the KOHOE), an environment to create great children and future members of a society based on God's Ways, Companionship, a great place for others to join them and praise the Lord with them, etc. One part of this contract is satisfaction of the sexual desires of the married couple!
The best way is to make sexual relationships a dance. However, not everyone is able to do that and be that High all the time, so...
The man should discipline himself to have sex with his wife whenever his wife is ready for it. However, the wife should fulfill the sexual desires of her husband every time he expresses a desire to have sex with her (this is part of the contract of marriage, as stated above). If the wife consistently cannot do this, then she should agree for her husband to have other wives!
The polygamist approach to life is also acceptable when having more children is desired, or for some reason(s) the first wife agrees to this kind of lifestyle. In fact it seems men are created to be polygamists, as they have sexual desires all through their lives but women do not. However, men can go more toward God in old age and so direct this energy more toward Higher things and reaching God!
Similarly, if a man cannot sexually satisfy his wife, and she complains and is unhappy about it, then she also has the right to divorce him and marry another man, if she so desires. However, usually women want children and after many childbirths and menopause have diminished sexual desire. So if they like they can stay in the marriage to have a supportive and secure environment for their children and themselves.
In all matters related to the married couple that do not affect the society and their community, the final decisions rest on the couple. It is not the business of any other person or entity, including the government!
If a woman has unrealistic (unreasonable) sexual desire then she has a problem on her hands. She should discipline herself to control it. Otherwise she might end up with many strange men and might even become a source of spreading venereal diseases to many people. This is also true for men if they have sexual relationships with many strange women and undisciplined sexual relationships (disciplined sex is through marriage and staying faithful, controlled through testing for venereal diseases and prevention).
There is no recommendation for women to have many husbands because it does not increase the number of children. Also, after menopause (and having many children) they will not be interested in sexual relationships as much, while the men (if a woman were to have many husbands) would still have this desire almost all through their lives. This might create an intolerable situation for all involved!
One common concern of couples is: We have had enough children and do not want any more, what can we do? Children are a Blessing. However, there are reasons to want to stop having too many of them (although this should not be too much of a concern in the COLs). In these cases, there are many natural ways to prevent pregnancy. It is again up to the couple to decide which one to use.
If you have the inclination, time, energy, and desire: The most natural way would be to make sex a dance and Spiritual experience (Tantra Meditation). In this case the couple makes life a sexual relationship (closeness, cooperation, etc.) and an actual sexual act will follow the Tantra way. The Tantra way is to meditate together, love, caress, and have a very long foreplay without reaching the ultimate goal of sexual relationships. The idea is to enjoy it and control it so you can eventually overcome it. Even if the ultimate state is close, delay it as much as you can until you have no choice.
Artificial and chemical prevention (pills for instance) is not recommended. It really destroys the human body. Indeed we have to follow Nature and Its ways in all things. You can fool Nature a little (it is not really fooled but tolerates it). But if you push Nature too far it will react harshly!
Having many partners destroys the Spirit (change the aura of the person) and they will become promiscuous (cannot be satisfied with one partner). With no checks and balances, this lifestyle will also spread venereal diseases to become epidemics! It further will create great confusion and discord in families (destroys the Kingdom)!
5- How about divorce? Is it allowed in the Mission?
If couples are One Flesh, are One in God, there is no room for divorce!
However, this is the ideal, and idealism and reality do not always match. This is even more true in the time period between now and the formation of the Communities of Light. Once our system, which is based on the Communities of Light, is established, there will be a great support structure to keep couples together. Couples will be discouraged from this act, which is most destructive to themselves and society.
For imperfect situations, and for
situations when even the Communities of Light agree
that a couple should divorce, the guidelines below will be greatly
Possible acceptable reasons for divorce:
1. One spouse has an addiction s/he cannot conquer that is causing significant harm to the family.
2. Adultery by either spouse.
3. Sexual perversion: Homosexuality, pedophilia, bestiality, etc.
4. Mental illness which is greatly disturbing to the family.
5. Impotency, infertility, frigidity, or withholding sex.
6. Any type of abuse (physical, mental, emotional, and/or spiritual).
7. Criminal activity.
8. Immoral acts (acts which are not necessarily illegal, but are harmful to the community and the society).
9. Un-Godliness: Not following Godly Ways (especially in the Communities of Light), turning away from God.
10. Permanent or long-term loss of consciousness (vegetative state). This includes long-term comas (if the partner is contemplating divorce in this situation, probably it is a good idea to wait around 6 months before making a final decision).
11. Financial irresponsibility by either partner.
12. Any deep and unresolvable issues that make the couple not to be one flesh.
13. Venereal diseases.
14. Abandonment: One partner leaves the other permanently (dying suddenly, being killed in war, etc. can be categorized as abandonment. These categories would be for purely legal purposes so the spouse could continue with their life, if they chose to divorce from the missing partner).
a. A reasonable period of time should be designated for the couple to live separately and try to resolve their differences before the final decision is made.
b. It is up to the couple to proceed with divorce or not! If they decide to divorce, it should be done with the greatest compassion and maturity possible.
How to make a marriage successful:
1. Focus on God (the most important consideration): If this is achieved by the couple, any marriage will last forever. It is falling into the lower nature that leads to disagreements, resentment, separation, etc. Marriage based on God is so High that the mundane will not bring it down to lower levels. It is only in the lower levels (in the lower nature) that most people divorce.
2. Focus on Spiritual teacher: If focusing on the Formless, Invisible, Nameless, and Eternal (FINE or God) is difficult for the couple, they should focus on the Spiritual teacher. By focusing on the Spiritual teacher, again the couple will be Blessed as they have another focus outside of themselves to be concerned for. However, the Ultimate Goal is to be Connected to God (FINE).
3. Focus on the betterment of the Community: The couple should focus on becoming productive and helpful members of the Communities of Light. The family and the Community will become more important than their small problems.
4. Focus on helping their parents: Again the couple becomes more interested in their family than themselves.
5. Sacrifice for the partner and his/her needs: One more step to dissolving the ego and becoming egoless is to become other-centered, rather than self-centered. Of course, this should be mutual, not that one party sacrifices everything and the other just takes!
6. Communication: The spouses have to learn how to communicate in a mature way, be respectful to one another, be patient, honest, and accepting, and have integrity in their relationship and communications.
7. Commitment: Marriage without commitment is fornication. There has to be a great commitment by the couple to make the marriage an environment where God and His Will Manifests to the Highest.
8. Stop any unproductive arguments, etc.: Instead of arguments there should be discussions and a sense of unity based on God. The couple should be a team to do His Will. They are partners to Manifest God. They should both be Committed to God!
9. Marriage should be based on the Will of God: Any other reasons are not good (God) enough.
10. Consulting Elders in the Communities of Light: The couple might consult with the Elders (or with anyone they might consider helpful). Any advice they receive should be based on what is God's Will for the situation. The final decision should still be made by the couple, and they will bear the consequences of their decision!
Since sex (uncovering one's
nakedness) is a part of marriage, when the Bible
talks about uncovering the nakedness of someone, not only does it mean
you should not see their nakedness, but also you should not marry them!
Who you cannot marry is clearly revealed in the following verses from
Leviticus chapter 18 (comments by Maitreya are in
brackets and bolded):
6 - None of you shall approach to any that is near of kin to him, to uncover their nakedness: I am the Lord.
7 - The nakedness of thy father, or the nakedness of thy mother, shalt thou not uncover: she is thy mother; thou shalt not uncover her nakedness [father and mother].
8 - The nakedness of thy father's wife shalt thou not uncover: it is thy father's nakedness [step-mother or father's other wives].
9 - The nakedness of thy sister, the daughter of thy father, or daughter of thy mother, whether she be born at home, or born abroad, even their nakedness thou shalt not uncover [sister, step-sister, or half-sister].
10 - The nakedness of thy son's daughter, or of thy daughter's daughter, even their nakedness thou shalt not uncover: for theirs is thine own nakedness [grandchildren].
11 - The nakedness of thy father's wife's daughter, begotten of thy father, she is thy sister, thou shalt not uncover her nakedness [step-sister or half-sister].
12 - Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy father's sister: she is thy father's near kinswoman [aunt from father's side].
13 - Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy mother's sister: for she is thy mother's near kinswoman [aunt from mother's side].
14 - Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy father's brother, thou shalt not approach to his wife: she is thine aunt [uncles and their wives].
15 - Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy daughter in law: she is thy son's wife; thou shalt not uncover her nakedness [daughter-in-law].
16 - Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of thy brother's wife: it is thy brother's nakedness [sister-in-law].
17 - Thou shalt not uncover the nakedness of a woman and her daughter, neither shalt thou take her son's daughter, or her daughter's daughter, to uncover her nakedness; for they are her near kinswomen: it is wickedness [after marrying the mother, cannot marry her daughters or her grandchildren, and vice versa].
18 - Neither shalt thou take a wife to her sister, to vex her, to uncover her nakedness, beside the other in her life time [cannot marry sisters at the same time].
19 - Also thou shalt not approach unto a woman to uncover her nakedness, as long as she is put apart for her uncleanness [during menstrual/monthly cycle].
20 - Moreover thou shalt not lie carnally with thy neighbour's wife, to defile thyself with her [neighbors' and friends' wives].
21 - ..., neither shalt thou profane the name of thy God: I am the Lord [do not defile the Name of God].
King James Version
There are limitations on whom you can marry (uncover their nakedness) and whom you cannot, which are observed in almost all cultures. What God has permitted for humans is called Halal in Islam, and what is not permitted is called Haram!
According to these verses, those who are Haram (not permitted) to marry are: Your mother, step-mother, or, if your father is a polygamist, the other wives he has; your sisters, step-sisters, half-sisters, grandchildren, aunts, uncles and their wives, daughters-in-law or sisters-in-law; marrying sisters at the same time; marrying a mother and her daughters or grandchildren, even after separation; neighbors' and friends' wives. We can also add to this list your children and adopted children, their children, and whoever has not reached the age of puberty. Furthermore, as explained above, you cannot have any sexual relationships with a woman during her monthly period, even if she is Halal (permitted).
Anyone who is not mentioned in this list is Halal for you to marry.
Someone asked: If this is true, then why did Jacob (Israel) marry sisters (Rachel and Leah), and later Bilhah and Zilpah, all daughters of Laban? We might also consider: It is forbidden to lay with one's daughters, however Lot's daughters arranged for this to happen!
The answer to these questions was clearly given by Christ when He asked: Was it lawful for David to eat the shewbread, when it was forbidden for him to do so? Christ made the point very clear that: All these rules are for humans to use so they live according to the Will of God. However, in extreme situations, God is very flexible. So all things are dependent on the time, place, and people involved.
God told Jacob he would have twelve sons. Neither his father nor his grandfather had twelve sons (not even close). He wanted Rachel, but he was tricked into marrying Leah, her older sister. So he worked hard and eventually married Rachel as well. Later he might have realized, and most probably God had permitted it, that he needed more women to have twelve sons, so he also married Bilhah and Zilpah. So the law was bent to fit the time, place, and his situation!
It is the same in the case of Lot. There were no men to marry his daughters so they could have children. If they did not have children with him, it would have been the end of his seed. So again it was permitted and the rule was bent to accommodate the situation.
In fact that is the whole idea and reason for the elaborate explanation of this section (marriage and sexuality). The whole idea is to create flexible situations according to the time, place, and people involved. Man and his laws should never compromise the flexibility of God's Laws in extreme situations. That is why governmental and political maneuvering should not be allowed to create laws which are not according to God's Will. You cannot regulate the flexible Laws of God. Many nations have tried and at the end failed. Even in the case of polygamy, still western societies have not succeeded in stopping it. Although they pretend to abhor this practice, many have mistresses and sexual scandals abound!
However, this does not mean that we can now bend God's rules all the time (or according to our own desires) and say I am breaking the Law because God wants me to. Remember, not everyone is connected to God as close as His Prophets and His People are. They know what is God's Will and so do not create any karma. If one breaks His Laws from passion or ignorance, it will create great karma for the person (the misuser). So be careful to follow His Will from Knowledge.
7- I have a question on masturbation since the Mission doesn't really seem to talk about it directly. I could not find anything about it in the website. Now I do know that lust for a woman and thinking wrongly in your head is not the way at all. And fornication outside of marriage is likewise. So my question is, is masturbation without thinking of a woman but merely doing it to avoid the desire to want the flesh of another person wrong as well? Or would doing it, with in your mind holding the thought of just a release and also the health benefits from it be ok? Or would it still be considered bad because it is still a fleshy desire?
Indeed, before this answer there was no mention of this in the website, and there was a good reason for it:
If you can stop doing this that would be great, but we have found that most people who claim they want to stop, do not!
The best is to marry young after puberty so the man or woman has a wife or husband and never needs this. However, with the wrong setup of our societies, many young people do not have such an opportunity and so they are bound to do this.
So the ideal is: Do not do it. However, this might be an unacceptable request. So resist it as much as you can, but if you cannot..., be discreet!
An alternative to this is: Tantra Masturbation, similar to Sexual Tantra! In Sexual Tantra, the idea is to overcome sexual desire by couples meditating while having sex. They delay the final relief to realize the nature of sex and so become more one in spirit instead of desiring too much sex with each other. Their relationship becomes a Cosmic Dance. The sex becomes less and less important, and even if they do perform the sexual act it is greatly enhanced.
In Tantra Masturbation also a person meditates on the act, delays the orgasm, and becomes one with the act. Indeed he can realize how the Kundalini is stimulated, arisen, and felt. He might be able to feel the full ecstasy (even greater) of orgasm without climaxing. His kundalini might even rise and the desire for the final state might vanish. The desire for such a sexual urge can be overcome and the energy saved can be used for Greater Purposes/Causes!
Furthermore you might consider using the techniques the Mission has provided to control sexual desires:
1. Eating more vegetables (instead of too much meat).
4. Lungota (for men).
5. Reminder, to direct your thoughts to higher self or God.
6. Kirtan (takes you to higher thoughts). Any spiritual social activity, such as Kirtan, collective meditation, etc. also provides the possibility of finding a Godly partner.
7. Avoid stimulating situations that might weaken your resolve to stay Pure!
In one sense, if a man cannot find a woman who is Godly and willing to Follow Godly Ways, but only ones that are domineering and use sex to dominate, this way is better than letting them get their way! If you can overcome such women without doing this, that is even better (the recommendations above will help).
Similarly, if a woman cannot find a Godly man who will support her and can be the head of the family, the same applies to her!
If a society as a whole has lost the Ways of God (where men are no longer the head) and women become domineering and use their body (and power) to dominate men (make them a shell of a man) then we need real men to change this trend! One way for men to do this is to become strong and detached from wanting such women who try to change the rules of God.
The best is for couples to become partners in life. However, there are situations where one of them has to have the final word!
He who overcomes sexual desires can overcome almost anything!
Tantra, in a nutshell, means the ability to go through situations in life without being affected by them, to be able to enter a very gross and/or difficult situation while 100% being aware of what is happening, learning the lesson, and leaving that situation unscathed. By being in that meditative state, and being aware of any situation you are in, you always learn the lesson of that situation and so become wiser after any experience without being affected negatively (or not being affected that much).
For example, drinking and going to the bars is not a Godly action. However, one might for some unforeseeable reason have to go to a bar. In that case, the person might not drink, but can observe how alcohol affects people, how they become louder, rowdy, irrational, and might take risks that they might not have taken if they were not drunk, etc. Then one sees the negative effect of drinking and so decides they will not do it themselves. They make this decision by being aware of why it should not be done, not because they are told not to do it.
Or you might have an unfounded fear of specific situations or things (like a fear of harmless spiders, etc.). You might decide to meditate on these fears and even take action to intentionally experience them. As you go through these situations, with being completely aware of what is happening, you might overcome these unfounded fears, etc.
With these actions, with complete awareness of what is happening, you see these situations as they are, not what you imagine they are. To know/see clearly what everything IS in life is to achieve the ultimate Awareness and Enlightenment.
In other words: Tantra is opposite to Yoga. Yoga is to abstain from the world; Tantra is to experience the world but be aware of how it affects you, learn the lesson, and overcome it.
This also applies to sexual desires. Yogis become renunciates (sannyasins). The Tantric practitioner goes through it, realizes it as it really is, and might overcome the desire, or at least use it for further Enlightenment! Many people know this side of Tantra (sexual Tantra) and indulge in it without knowing how it works and never reach Enlightenment.
Sexual Tantra is: Couples, who have great sexual desires, engage in the sexual act (hopefully married, be it temporarily). During the act they are completely aware of every step in their sexual relationship (meditate). It is not a regular fast sexual relationship but a slow and deliberate way in a meditative state, with awareness of how things affect them, etc. They maintain this awareness all through their sexual encounter. They will not succumb to the desire to reach the climax but are aware as this stage approaches.
If the couple stays in complete awareness of what is happening, eventually they will experience the ecstasy of raising (more like unfolding) the kundalini! The experience is many times more intense than the climax many people regularly experience. In fact, they become completely aware of how the kundalini rises from the lower chakras to the crown of the head (Seventh Chakra). The experience is not a temporary one but lasts for days and eventually might become permanent.
Indeed, if this state is experienced correctly, one can be in it, in a much more intense way, without any sexual act. In these situations, your connection will be with Spirit, not with another person! Those who eventually overcome sexual desires, and meditate regularly (as the Mission prescribes), will reach this stage (experience rising Kundalini and God) much faster.
Note 1: "Rising" of the kundalini might be misleading. Probably it should be called "unfolding" of the kundalini. The feeling is like a serpent rising from being coiled 3+ times (in a more intense way than any regular sexual fulfillment)!
9- In conclusion, can you in brief explain about sexual relationships?
CONCLUSION: Sex is a very delicate topic (like many others) which cannot be answered in a black and white manner. It is not just a physical function, as many would like to believe. It has physical, mental, emotional, social, spiritual, and many other levels of impact on the couple and society.
The guidelines, as a Light, are given all throughout THOTH. These answers to these specific questions are only guidelines, and, we hope, will further help in understanding this topic. However, if you do not want to see it as a spiritual function, probably even these answers will not help you much.
In fact, if the answers to your questions are not found within, the answers from without have very little significance. Of course, the answers from without, when coming from the Spirit (God), hopefully, will quicken the Spirit in you (within).
In general we can consider the physical sexual relationship as a physical function of the second chakra, which is a part of the lower nature. Therefore, to use this function in a purely fleshly sense (from passion or ignorance) will stimulate the lower self and will create confusion and suffering(s).
However, like everything else, if it is approached from the higher self (from the Spirit of God's point of view), this very earthly function becomes holy. It becomes a blessing physically (there is a lot of healing power in sexual energy), mentally (creating a great feeling of security for the family and community), emotionally (satisfying emotional needs such as closeness, companionship, etc.), and spiritually (great ethereal bonds, etc.).
The goal is to transform these lower energies to higher ones, to make them into Blessing(s): To transform lust to Love! This can only be done by following God's Laws. In achieving this goal we will have greater Love for the whole universe, including our partner. The sexual relationship will then become a small part of this overall Love. Now, in these last days of the old era, the sexual relationship should once more, like everything else, be based on God's Will and so become a Blessing again.
In order to transform lust to Love, married couples may adopt Tantric techniques. In this case, they will gain control over their sexual longings, preserve their energies, and learn how to control their desires for the ultimate goal of the physical sexual relationship (orgasm). However, this is not recommended for young couples or for those who want to have children! Also, it should not be practiced to the point where it prevents any chance of pregnancy on a mass scale in society, unless it is decided and is deemed necessary to limit the number of children born (for couples and/or society as a whole).
Of course, as it is repeated in THOTH over and over again, all things depend on the time, place, and people involved (situation). According to the situation, the course of action one takes can be from ignorance (will bring suffering to the self and/or others), passion (will create confusion), or knowledge (will bring Blessings to All).
There are no black and white answers to most questions in the universe. The formation of the Communities of Light based on pure married couples (a man and a woman) with pure children, following the Eternal Divine Path, will eventually bring the above truths to All. Those who are out of the Communities of Light and/or are not able to join because their understanding has not reached a higher level, will stay where they are. They will have to go through their sufferings and confusions until they see that only the Ways of God are clear. "Narrow is the way ... and few there be that find it" (Matthew 7:14).
This of course does not mean we have no compassion for them. Indeed, as the Communities of Light evolve, those who have not joined us will also be helped in the process. This can happen in a greater degree if they listen to the guidelines we have given them here and all throughout our teachings. Eventually many will see more clearly that the way of God is full of Light and Peace. They will choose His Ways.
I tried very hard to avoid answering these questions and topics. They are too complicated and are based on individuals and specific situations. However, it seems many want some answers (or at least guidelines) for these questions. I tried to give you the guidelines for them, and I hope they will bring Blessings to you all, and not suffering.
There are Absolute Laws of God (such as marriage between a man and a woman) and there are relative laws (personal will and choices, such as marrying a specific person, etc.). In the case of Absolute Laws, there is no compromise. In the case of relative laws, the person and the circumstances have to be considered. The decisions have to lead to the best result. What is given here are guidelines to achieve such results.
Again, if the marriage is based on God and the couple is One in God, they are One Flesh forever!